Warped: A Twisted Story
by emmettluvr27
Summary: So Hermione and Ron get sent to the NCC-1701-D. What the heck are they doing there? Hiatus
1. So How's Life?

********I DO NOT OWN STAR TREK OR HARRY POTTER! Although, like many people out there, I wish I did. Then we really could have some fun! :D

* * *

William T. Riker was not having a very good day. After Wesley had rudely interrupted his jazz solo, called his bluff in the poker game, and rewired the bridge so that Wesley was in command instead of him, he decided he loathed all children, especially loud, know-it-all, rude brainiacs. But, unluckily for Will, his day was going to get a lot worse.

* * *

Life could never have been more perfect for a certain poofy-haired, prodigious witch. Having received her monthly grade report from her professors, she couldn't be more proud of her straight Oustandings. Not only her life inside the class flourished. Viktor Krum, the Durmstrang exchange student, had just recently asked her out tomorrow night. Her life couldn't be better even if she had taken Felix Felicis. Until now, when Mr. Felix would have come in very handy.

In the empty common room, Hermione Granger put the finishing touches on her current project.  
Miss Granger had nothing better to do in her infinite boredom, so she created what Muggles would call a "Time Machine," although it was more of a complicated mixture of quite a few things besides metal and the laws of physics. After seeing the runes of ancient Egypt and witnessing the virgin sacrifices of ancient Slytherins long ago...  
_I knew there was always something wrong with that house, and here we have Salazar Slytherin himself showing his pupils how to perform the ritual_ Hermione decided to do something productive.

"I will stop this horrendous war before it started. At last He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named will be vanquished forever. Not that I have anything better to do, of course. And besides, it would save Harry quite a bit of trouble."

So Hermione set the device to the precise date and time she wished to travel to. She thought she would change the past. Little did she know she would alter the future.


	2. Unexpected Journeys

**Chapter 2: Unexpected Journeys**

* * *

Ron Weasley woke with a start. He had fallen off of his bed. Again.

_When am I going to stop being such a klutz. _

Ron heard a strange noise in the common room and decided to investigate. The red haired boy crept carefully out of the 5 year Gryffindor dormatories to find the cause of the racket. And, in one of his brighter moments, remembered to put on his shoes. As his dismounted the stairs quietly, he heard the familiar voice of a certain 5th year prefect.

Ron was shocked that Hermione was up this late without telling either Harry or him. The freckled-face boy was about to call out to one of his best friends when he tripped over his shoelace and landed on Hermione just as she set the device in motion. Being stupid as only Ron Weasley can be, he managed to change the settings on Hermione's contraption, and together they went on a most unexpected journey through time and space.

* * *

"Commander, the cargo from shuttle bay 2 is in transporter room 3, but there are a couple of crates that I'd like you to check out."

"Thank you, Chief. I'll be on my way. Mr. Worf, with me."

The tall first officer was quickly followed by a strange wolf-bear humaniod, who was their Security Chief.

"What's up with those crates?" Wesley asked inquisitively.

But the duo had stepped into the turbolift in record time. First, because there was a situation to handle. Second, they wanted to get away from Wesley.

"Transporter room 3." growled Worf in the turbolift.

The turbolift brought them to a startled Chief O'Brien. The Chief wasn't sure if he should be scared or relieved that the senior officers had arrived. That could only mean further involvement with the situation, or total ignorance.

"What seems to be the problem, Chief?"

"Well, sir," O'Brien started. "The crates are moving. We didn't order anything that moved." O'Brien's Irish accent quickly became nearly uncomprehandable by his fellow crew mates. This happened often when he was nervous or under pressure.

At that moment the previously still crates began to move. One of the crates started to sway back and forth feebly, while the other shook violently, like Mrs. Weasley when provoked. At that, Worf made a slight face.

"Mr. Worf," Riker started. "I do believe you are a bit frightened."

"Klingons are never frightened," he replied in a slightly agitated voice. "They are merely... surprised."

"Well, would the surprised Klingon and befuddled Chief please please put their phasers on stun. I am going to open the first crate."

Will Riker went for the more passive crate. There he discovered the body of a sleeping red haired 15 year old boy, who didn't seem to know he was perceived as a threat. The Chief looked at Will meekly, his ears turning a violent shade of red, expecting a "why are you wasting my time look," but Will was too busy looking at Worf, who seemed to think that the boy was egging them on by sucking his thumb. But sleeping Ron Weasley was still asleep, dreaming of whatever he dreams of in that empty head of his.

The other crate was making screaching noises that sounded something like: **Your mother is a** *beep beep beep***ing***beep***lorem ipsum***beep beep beep***admiumvenium***beep beep beep beep***turolagulio***beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep* **hippopotamus***beep beep beep beep beep beep* **Republican** *beep beep beep* **Daniel Radcliffe** *beep beep beep beep* **with a bucket of** *beep beep beep beep* **in a castle far away where no one can hear you** *beep beep beep beep beep beep* **soup** *beep beep beep* **with a bucket of** *beep beep* **Mickey Mouse** *beep beep* **with a stick of dynamite** *beeeeeepppp* **magical** *beep beep beep beep* **ALAKAZAM!**

Riker seemed genuinely scared to even approach the other crate, and Worf muttered something about dying in battle.

"O'Brien, please take this boy to sickbay will ya?"

Riker gave him a worried look, but Miles O'Brien was more than relieved to leave the tense transporter room, even if it was just to save his skin. It was only Riker and Worf against this dastardly creature. They both looked at each other and carefully approached the crate together. Then, with the utmost care, it was opened.

**"RONALD BILLIUS WEASLEY! I AM GOING TO KILL YOU IF IT'S THAT LAST THING I DO!"**

With that, the creature inside was stunned and sent to sickbay.

And Worf and Riker were going to have a hell of a nightmare tonight.

* * *

Please review! Tell me what you think!


	3. Sickbay

**Chapter 3: Sickbay**

* * *

Ron Weasley was in heaven. Everything was going perfectly. He had just won the Quidditch Cup and the whole Gryffindor house was cheering erratically. The Slytherins stared at him with disgust, but to Ron, every scowl was worth ten times any cheer. To have triumphed over the enemy had such a satisfying feeling to it. At that point, Hermione descended from the roaring stands, and gently put her arms around his shoulders, their lips only centimeters apart...

* * *

"Doctor, I think he's coming to."

Doctor Beverly Crusher leaned in to examine her new patient. The patient unconsciously did the same thing, leaving their lips a few uncomfortable centimeters apart.

And then Ron Weasley woke up.

The moment Ron's eyes fluttered opened, the two back away swiftly, although the awkwardness of it all still hung in the air. Ron took a strange look around at the instruments and such, and tried to piece together where he could possibly be.

_They've sent me to St. Mungo's or something like that. I must've hit my head pretty bloody hard. But, that still doesn't make sense. Then again, if all the Healers look like this, then I might consider staying here. _

_" _'Scuse me, Miss Healer," he called out to Beverly. "Do you think you could get me a cup of tea? And tell me mum that I know this'll probably cost a ton of galleons 'n' stuff, so she won't have to get me that Cleansweep for my birthday."

Beverly nodded understandingly, but she could neither understand what the boy was talking about, nor notify his mother, which pained her the most. Being a mother herself, she could understand what his mother was going through and felt some sympathy for the child.

Beverly was about to give the boy some words of comfort when the sedated patient across then room woke up and the outburst was sent right at Ron.

**"RONALD BILLIUS WEASLEY! LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE! MERLIN'S PANTS!"**

"Mum?"

"You've messed up the whole space/time continuum adjustments on the device! You killed it! Two whole semesters of work! IT'S RUINED!"

"Get her a sedative! Quick!"

And with one shot, Hermione's wrath was quieted.

"Crusher to Picard."

"Yes, Doctor."

"I'd like to see you in sickbay immediately. It's an emergency."

"On my way. Picard out."

Ron was still frozen in horror after Hermione's vicious screams.

_So if I'm not at St. Mungo's... Then where in the bloody hell am I?_


	4. Questions of Misunderstood

**Chapter 4: Questions of Misunderstood**

**

* * *

**

Wesley Crusher was having such a horrible day. He had Commander Riker on his back for asking a crucial question during one of his performances, accidentally continuing a poker game which ended with substantial loss to the commander, and re-wired the Enterprise to impress one of his friends from Starfleet Academy. His friend from Starfleet Academy wasn't so impressed either. She thought he was an arrogant git for taking over the Enterprise like that. Months of crucial research had been wasted, gone down the drain, nothing to show for it but mental scarring after being chewed out by Commander Riker for his misconduct. But they just didn't understand.

It seemed like nobody could understand him fro what he was. He was, well, a genius. There was no denying that. No matter how snobbish or stuck up he was, he was smart, a prodigy of some sorts. But still misunderstood. There was nothing that could challenge him. Literature, computers, and holodecks can only go so far. There was a human learning experience he hadn't grasped yet, from people who could truly challenge him, and understand his dilemma. Even his mother seemed somewhat puzzled at the boy's _interesting_ experiments.

But his mother was the only one who ever came close to _deciphering_ what went on in Wesley's head. And to his mother he went. Sickbay should be a quiet place to explain, well, tell his mother what had happened with Commander Riker and vent. But sickbay was just in shambles.

It seemed that they were having trouble with one of the patients. A girl about fifteen was lying on a bed, both arms and legs securely strapped to her bed. Both the Captain and Doctor Crusher were looking over her great interest.

"Beverly, we can't send them back if we don't know where they're from. And these could be potentially dangerous creatures. Who knows what they may come up with next. And these sticks they carry around."

"Captain, the girl seems perfectly aware of where she is, or at least that she's not where she was before. But the boy seems utterly clueless. He spoke to me as if he were still in his own world. And said something about Galleons and a Cleansweep. It's all been so confusing."

"Are you implying that he may have come here as a hostage?"

"Well, it's possible isn't it? And Will reported that she made something of a death threat to him in the transporter room."

"But, we can't assume anything. We have to have these two under surveillance. And since you said the injuries were minor, we can question them―"

"Within twenty-four hours."

"Thank you, Doctor. I will be expecting a full report on this. And I would like to know more about these sticks they carry around with them. They're quite entreating."

"Yes, Captain."

Captain Picard left sickbay with many puzzled thoughts.

Wesley, all doubt of his existence gone, approached his mother as Picard left sickbay.

"Mom, who are these people?"

"They're people we picked up in a cargo shipment."

"So they came to drop the stuff off."

"No. They WERE the cargo shipment. When some parts came in Chief O'Brien noticed moving crates, and out popped these two."

Wesley glanced at the unconscious bodies again.

"Are, they, ummm, human?"

"Well Wes, they seem to be. Their DNA structures are quite similar to ours, but there's something funky in their DNA, almost like a mutated chromosome. It comes out as normal on the tricorders, but if you look at the full body layout, there's something a bit odd about those chromosomes."

Wesley took another look at the unconscious girl.

_I don't care how many weird chromosomes she has. She's looks like a real pretty girl to me._

_

* * *

_Ron was totally clueless. As always. Being stuck in an unknown environment can do that to you. He heard voices, but didn't dare open his eyes, ore move his body.

"Are, they, ummm, human?"

"Well Wes, they seem to be. Their DNA structures are quite similar to ours, but there's something funky in their DNA, almost like a mutated chromosome. It comes out as normal on the tricorders, but if you look at the full body layout, there's something a bit odd about those chromosomes."

Then Ron saw something he wished he didn't.

_That slimey git! He's gaping all over Hermione! And, what's worse, he looks like Malfoy. Is that his hand wandering towards hers? That's it! Imma nail him!_

That was too much for Ron. First he lands in a strange world. Then he was screamed at by Hermione, whom he thought was his mother. Now he was seeing a potential rival of affections making a move on her unconscious body. With that, he took out his wand.

"Unhand her you slimey git! What are you gaping at her for!"


	5. Bloody Technology

**Chapter 5: Bloody Technology**

**

* * *

**

"Wes, I need to check some things in the lab. I'll be right back."

"Ok, Mom."

Wesley took a good long stare at the girl strapped on the bed. So cold, so beautiful. It seemed like there was something there that was the answer to all his problems, just waiting for him to reach out and touch. And slowly, a part of him he did not understand took control, and the hand of the girl on the table was in his. He was in a world that he did not want to understand, past all the galaxies and then some.

"Unhand her you slimey git! What are you gaping at her for!"

Wesley came back to reality in a second. The body he thought was unconscious was standing up point a wooden twig at him, about twelve inches long. The red haired boy was wearing late 20thcentury pajama bottoms with small golden flying objects that were actually moving. But for some reason, he didn't feel a bit intimidated. There was something quite pathetic about someone waving a stick in your face, especially if most of the people you knew carried phasers that could blast you into dust particles if necessary.

"You know, I know 20 ways to kill you with one word, and plenty more to make you wish you were dead."

"Well, who needs 20 ways when with a push of a button, you'll be dead!"

The good doctor heard raised voices and had the good sense to come investigate.

"Wesley, I heard raised voices... What do you think you're doing! And to the patient no less!"

At that point the two boys had given up on magic wands and fancy phasers and were wrestling each other on the ground.

"Oh! Wesley get off the floor right—WAIT! THE SEDA-"

"_Petrificus totalus! Petrificus Totalus!"_

But Doctor Crusher was not allowed to finish her sentence. The doctor was on the floor along with her son unable to move any of her body. And she went under.

* * *

"Hermione! You're back! Did you see the way I was beating him up! He didn't stand a chance!"

"Ron! You are an arrogant toerag! We could have been discovered! WE COULD HAVE BEEN KILLED!"

"Well, umm, never thought of that..."

"Of course, you never think. Oh, never mind. What we have to do is modify their memories. But think of the variables..."

"Hermione, where are we exactly?"

"I'm not sure. They seem to have confiscated our time traveling device, so I can't check our location there. But from what I've made out, we must be some 300-400 years into the future."

"So these are Muggles? But all the stuff they have here couldn't have been produced without magic, could it?"

"You'd be surprised by what Muggles could accomplish."

The two bodies in the room began to stir.

"Oh, stupid electricity! It's beginning to interfere with our magic!"

Ron couldn't believe what she was saying. He, who had been brought up in a wizarding family couldn't imagine a world where he couldn't make just about anything happen with a swish of a wand and a few well chosen words.

"NO MAGIC!"

"Ron! Don't be dense! It's just not as strong as it should be. When I wake them up, you should be right where they remembered you before they forgot."

"What? That doesn't make sense!"

"Nothing ever makes sense to you except Quidditch plays. Go back on the bed, Ron. Here we go: _Finite Incantatem. Obliviate. Obliviate."_

Hermione climbed back onto the bed she was on in sickbay, hoping the doctor and the other guy would forget the entire affair despite the excess of Muggle technology in the air.

* * *

"Wes, I need to check some things in the lab. I'll be right back."

"Ok, Mom."

"Wait, Mom, didn't you already do that?"

The female body winced

"Do what?"

"Check things in the lab?"

"Of course not, I've done just about everything I have to do today BUT check the experiments on _venomous tactula _from Nerendria 3."

Wesley looked around and studied his surroundings. Same old sickbay. Same old computers. Same two patients on the beds. But it still seemed like there was something out of place.

"Oh, alright. I have to go now."

"But Wesley, you just got here."

"No, I have a feeling that I've been here for too long."

Wesley exited sickbay with a puzzled expression. How was this possible? He had just entered Sickbay to ask his mother a few questions and then something about killing the slimey git and...

Nothing seemed exactly peachy-keen with him, so he went back to his room, determined to find out what just happened to him.


End file.
